the most important day

Guess what, everyone? My boyfriend and I got engaged last weekend! He shall here after be referred to as “fiancé,” which makes me sound like I’m writing to a wedding magazine for advice.

All women want to know how the proposal happened – even if we say we don’t believe in the wedding-industrial complex, we want to know the romantic details. We also care about the ring, even if we thought we were anti-commercialism and  immune to shiny things. Open secret: we are not. Another secret: I think men care about the ring, too. Sure, we’ve all been brainwashed to associate diamonds with true love, but mostly, I think people love what the ring symbolizes. I’m done discussing rings now. It’s an ethically complicated subject. I like my ring. I love my fiancé. Moving on.

Here’s how it happened: we went up the North Shore, found a dark, deserted plot of land with an open sky, lay down on a blanket, and watched the Perseid meteor shower. I had never seen shooting stars and I had also never been proposed to, so it was a night of firsts. (Footnote: even though I’ve been married previously, we did not have any kind of engagement or even a real wedding.) The next night, we had a romantic dinner at a lodge overlooking Lake Superior and saw a hummingbird feeding on some flowers next to our table, which I had also never seen before. There seems to have been a theme to our weekend.

We also went hiking at Gooseberry Falls, which has pretty impressive waterfalls for this part of the country. Summary: last weekend was really amazing.


I’m still on cloud nine, though I now find myself going into planning mode. Everyone knows weddings are expensive, but until you sit down and do some number crunching, you don’t fully comprehend it. You thought engagement rings were pricey? Talk about sticker shock.

As I’m emailing venues and trying to wrap my brain around hiring a DJ, I can’t help but think of all the other things we could put that money towards. I don’t know if one’s wedding is the “most important day of your life,” but it’s definitely meant to be memorable. It’s a chance to have your family and friends celebrate your love and commitment and have a little too much to drink while wearing fancy clothing. If it’s not the most important day, it’s certainly one of the most significant.

I’m not going to lie to you. I’m excited about the dress. I’m excited about looking for a photographer and exclaiming, “Are you kidding? $5,000 for a photographer that doesn’t know how to meter their camera?! WTF.” Most of all, I’m excited to see my new niece and nephews in their finery holding rings and flowers and generally being adorable.

Some more pics from our weekend:





4 thoughts on “the most important day

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